"Time and time again, we are learning to become humble, how to take the steps of humility, and how to talk humbly. And so, she wore that hat, and used those shoes."
Once I heard a pastor said, "you have not yet arrived." He is right, we will never come to that point in our lives where we will have complete knowledge of what is occurring in our lives, we will never get to a point where we are in complete control. We can contribute to the fact, however, there is a greater power a greater means that keeps us under His outmost care.
I have read several blogs from friends, from outside sources who share their experiences just to relieve the heart and soul...to pull that weight out and realease the pressure. Although these bloggers may or may not know, they do in turn teach a lesson to someone. I have definately learned a lot about how Transparency works. There is this HUGE denial when it comes to expressing in full terms and complete honesty what our weaknesses are. I fall under that category because I am afraid to experience Pitty. I share my past experiences, my life stories for one purpose, to clean up the attic and dust my life away.
I am a very fearful person, more so like a coward for not owning up to my truthful thoughts and experiences. And becoming what most would call, an open book. If you are one of my readers, you will note I write in metaphors. Yes, that is because I do not want the wrong person stumbling into my own experiences and taking it towards the negative side of things. By that I mean, there are many twisted minds and who knows what they can make sense out of or not.
Talk about transparancy, well, I cannot reveal my complete experiences as of yet. There is soo much I want to write about, so many events in my life, so many stories to share, however, I fear the pitty. My life stories are all true, I do not write to seek self satisfaction, but rather want to express my gratitude to GOD because despite the difficult times, you can see HIS presence through it all. I know most of my stories sound like stories from a book, from a creative mind, however, they are real. I share them in the hope that someone may take a little piece of knowledge or perhaps stop and think about their own life and reflect on their own experiences and knowledge. Ask me, I can tell you.
I have come a long way and there's still much learning to be done. Funny as this may sound, I feel like Dracula, old and prunny, but when I learn more about God and when I satisfy this thirst of knowledge, I tend to rejuvenate. No, am not a night owl, but rather a passionate minute to minute absorbing sponge.
I do have a question that perhaps anyone out there could throw me a piece of advice to:
When is it ok to burst out and say, I have had enough? Those who can't identify what humility is, mistake it for their own selfish needs...ignorant beings despite the ardous work one puts forth, will always want more and more, but where do you draw the line of being humble and allowing for the inner selfish being within oneself to come out and let out that fierce desperate cry to set oneself free?? Not making sense? Normal, have not put on my phylosophical hat on yet! T's you will see sometime soon!
Writting is my yoga, my zen, my dome, my heaven, my glass menagerie...it is my escape to elude the trecherous ways of perdition in daily bodily stress.
Again, I leave you with just this piece of blog...I do not like to write more than needed or sugar coat everything. So, what I have is what it is. Take what you can and leave the rest up for reflection :)
"beyond the fleshy wounds, remainds a soul, hidden from the vicious wolves of today's society...feeding itself with the purest of knowledge, protected, but ready to take on a battle and stand proud..ready to overcome whatever worldly temptations that may rise up against it..I shall not fear the deeds of this world for I stand next to the pillar of my soul!"
Folly Beach
1/23/11 - Maria
Thursday, September 15, 2011
Thursday, September 1, 2011
Sweating the Jersey for a Good Cause
"drop by drop the bodies began to moist the jerseys...each representing that symbol of every kid who sits back on a hospital bed...patiently waiting...the players poured out of their heart the struggle for survival in every intense move, kick, and score for a CURE..."
August 26th & 27th - ISOL & EL SOL Tournament of Hope benefiting the St. Jude Children's Research Hospital
First off, it took a lot of work to plan something out outside of El Sol's norms. First time we venture into creating a sporting event something that is not a VIP party with celebrities, etc. This was an exciting time for all of us! The purpose, to raise awareness within the Latino/Hispanic Communities about St. Jude and the fact that our station [the only spanish radio station in Charleston] will be conducting their 6th Annual Radioton Promesa Y Esperanza 2011 on September 22nd and 23rd.
So, as the brain behind the tournament, I am proud to say that everything worked 100% to it's purpose. Sure, next time will be better, however, we did an incredible job at getting the attention of the community through something they love to to - playing and watching soccer!
There were 8 teams battling to Stand out and win first place a total of $300 in Cash, the recognition of being leaders not only in the field but with character and humility. Second place earned $150 Cash, plus medals that were passed to each player. Each team played 2 games, the 3rd game was elimination with the teams having the highest points would move to semi finals and then finals.
To me this was a way to capture the audience with something that our Latino Community loves to do. It was a complete success to see that everyone out there was very supportive to a good cause and knowing they were out there respresenting what most kids at St. Jude hunger for: a time to play and run freely expressing their joy through a single game. Regardless of the level of skills, competitivity, everyone kept in mind that although the kids of St. Jude were not amongst us, they were in our minds and hearts. That was the reason behind these games. The players represented Health and how winning a game is like fighting to win a fight for a cure, the constant struggle of getting one step closer to getting more kids where they need to be: home.
With each player in the field, ever kick, every goal, they represented that faith to continue to fight regardless! And of course not to give up. In soccer there is a time limit and so it is with Cancer, but for as long as we continue to fight together as a team we will overcome whatever is to come!
I am very proud of this community for being out there, to ISOL for providing the place and making this experience a memorable one! And to all the teams and fans for supporting the KIDS! Thanks to ALL!
Here are some radom pics of the final teams that advanced to finals, Maria Laura and I giving out the Thank you SPeech and reminding everyone what the purpose of these games were, and also random pics of the day's events.
"And the hearts and minds were moved, they were captivated by the presence of such kindred hearts pouring their hearts out in every game ..."
More pictures can be viewed by visiting http://www.facebook.com/ El Sol Wazs-AM [become our friend whether you speak Spanish or not, we still have FUN!]
August 26th & 27th - ISOL & EL SOL Tournament of Hope benefiting the St. Jude Children's Research Hospital
First off, it took a lot of work to plan something out outside of El Sol's norms. First time we venture into creating a sporting event something that is not a VIP party with celebrities, etc. This was an exciting time for all of us! The purpose, to raise awareness within the Latino/Hispanic Communities about St. Jude and the fact that our station [the only spanish radio station in Charleston] will be conducting their 6th Annual Radioton Promesa Y Esperanza 2011 on September 22nd and 23rd.
So, as the brain behind the tournament, I am proud to say that everything worked 100% to it's purpose. Sure, next time will be better, however, we did an incredible job at getting the attention of the community through something they love to to - playing and watching soccer!
There were 8 teams battling to Stand out and win first place a total of $300 in Cash, the recognition of being leaders not only in the field but with character and humility. Second place earned $150 Cash, plus medals that were passed to each player. Each team played 2 games, the 3rd game was elimination with the teams having the highest points would move to semi finals and then finals.
To me this was a way to capture the audience with something that our Latino Community loves to do. It was a complete success to see that everyone out there was very supportive to a good cause and knowing they were out there respresenting what most kids at St. Jude hunger for: a time to play and run freely expressing their joy through a single game. Regardless of the level of skills, competitivity, everyone kept in mind that although the kids of St. Jude were not amongst us, they were in our minds and hearts. That was the reason behind these games. The players represented Health and how winning a game is like fighting to win a fight for a cure, the constant struggle of getting one step closer to getting more kids where they need to be: home.
With each player in the field, ever kick, every goal, they represented that faith to continue to fight regardless! And of course not to give up. In soccer there is a time limit and so it is with Cancer, but for as long as we continue to fight together as a team we will overcome whatever is to come!
I am very proud of this community for being out there, to ISOL for providing the place and making this experience a memorable one! And to all the teams and fans for supporting the KIDS! Thanks to ALL!
Here are some radom pics of the final teams that advanced to finals, Maria Laura and I giving out the Thank you SPeech and reminding everyone what the purpose of these games were, and also random pics of the day's events.
"And the hearts and minds were moved, they were captivated by the presence of such kindred hearts pouring their hearts out in every game ..."
 |
| St. Jue Balloon Outisde |
 |
| The kids playing with water balloons {daniel and Maria Laura } |
 |
| Uniao America vs. Los Irresistibles - 2 teams that went into finals |
 |
| Me [Maria] & Maria Laura [Yang Scofano red] giving our Thank You Speech And presenting the Teams with the Trophies and recognition! (so there, who said a girl could not organize a little soccer tourney ;-) |
Wednesday, August 31, 2011
IN Need of a Prayer
"Weeping may endure for a night but joy comes in the morning" [a friend texted me this 8/31/11]
IT is true, things will be better in the morning! However, right about now, I am not feeling it. God knows I so want to spill the beans and let the cry of my heart break loose and set it free...but I must be patient and wait upon the Lord to direct the words....
Please say a prayer for me, for my husband Daniel, who has been undergoing some very distasteful, stressful, very frustrating moments at his job. I cannot go much into detail, however, please pray that the narrow minded, that the racial profiling, and that the high egos will understand and simply let him work in peace.
These issues have been stressing me a lot as well. We are both loosing sleep and it is very frustrating to feel so vulnerable and not being able to do much.
"Equal employment laws" ...uhm....
We need prayers, we need the spiritual intervention of our Father because I just cannot think of any other means to make this situation come to a stop. Please, to all the believers, the faithful souls out there, say a prayer for us.
We appreciate your support in advance. I know it is difficult to set aside time to pray for someone you hardly know or don't see often. I will be forever grateful regardless.
Blessings to all and I am blessed to have friends in my life who regardless of the time have never abandoned me :) Am truly blessed to have you!
"And so, the heart whep...and the journey began on the road paved with glass and thorns....yet they kept going...pressing forward on the fight for equality.."
IT is true, things will be better in the morning! However, right about now, I am not feeling it. God knows I so want to spill the beans and let the cry of my heart break loose and set it free...but I must be patient and wait upon the Lord to direct the words....
Please say a prayer for me, for my husband Daniel, who has been undergoing some very distasteful, stressful, very frustrating moments at his job. I cannot go much into detail, however, please pray that the narrow minded, that the racial profiling, and that the high egos will understand and simply let him work in peace.
These issues have been stressing me a lot as well. We are both loosing sleep and it is very frustrating to feel so vulnerable and not being able to do much.
"Equal employment laws" ...uhm....
We need prayers, we need the spiritual intervention of our Father because I just cannot think of any other means to make this situation come to a stop. Please, to all the believers, the faithful souls out there, say a prayer for us.
We appreciate your support in advance. I know it is difficult to set aside time to pray for someone you hardly know or don't see often. I will be forever grateful regardless.
Blessings to all and I am blessed to have friends in my life who regardless of the time have never abandoned me :) Am truly blessed to have you!
"And so, the heart whep...and the journey began on the road paved with glass and thorns....yet they kept going...pressing forward on the fight for equality.."
Thursday, August 11, 2011
Carrying the Cross...
"And as I glanced out of the corner of my eye, there stood the figure...the face...serious, but forgiving. He stood there setting aside his personal shame and embarrassment...waiting, simply waiting to be noticed...he stood there...so visible, yet invisible to the many hearts who simply glanced past him...and the humble heart, stumbled upon the symbolic object...."
It's Friday, 4pm somewhere in the middle of a hot-humid summer day. Kids are not in school, rather enjoying themselves at the local beach, rivers, or lakes. Everyone is unaware of the details that sorround our community.
Today, it is one of those Fridays, all entreprenurs, business folks, the typical or average worker is calling it the day. The typical paycheck to paycheck survivors are anxiously driving to their bank to cash in their weekly efforts to better their life. And yet, hidden behind this fast paced scenario is one man. A man, like a shadow perfectly standing there on top of the Montague overpass over the I-26 interstate. Quietly, so concentrated in just glancing through the windshields and into the minds of the unaware souls of his existence. Who is this man? And what is he doing there?
I am one of those passer bys, I capture his image out of the corner of my eye and he stands there, firmly. Lost in a world of his own, deep thought, slightly rubbing his well kept beard. Although it is a hot day, he is standing there with the Sun hitting behind him, making him the perfect invisible being to the eyes of the drivers passing underneath him. But faithfully, religously, he stands there every Friday staring into the distance of the long-rush hour traffic, hoping, and never loosing faith that someone out there will notice IT.
As he stands there so patienly, you can see he has labored so hard to be where he is. Although the Montegue passer bys get distracted, most have become acustomed to seeing him there. His attention however, is on those below him. As the sun blazes behind him, there IT stands, the CROSS. A wooden CROSS that he has so genuinly attached a wheel on the very bottom so that when he is carrying it, it becomes easier on his back and does not drag all the way up the ramp.
YES. He is carrying that cross with a purpose. Perhaps some may consider him a crazy old man. Someone who has nothing better to do, however, it is a simple reminder that regardless of where you are, what you are doing, even if stuck in a mad traffic such as I-26, that you should sit still for a moment and praise God for the wonders He is actively doing in everyone's life. He stands there, not asking for you to throw him money, nor for you to feel pitty or to show off his faith. He is there to give that symbol of peace and sanity.
As anyone who has ever driven on I-26 anytime and any day between the hours of 3pm and 6pm, you can expect to have some angry, frustrated drivers, yet they pause at the sight of such eloquent symbol.
"and so the figure who once had been invisible, the light finally shone upon the meaning of his presence...the light Reflected the one symbol the man was carrying...the CROSS"
Everyone has a cross of their own. We all have our daily struggles and we have to choose how we want to handle the daily tests of faith. Those sudden "burdens" often blind us from the real thing - the CROSS....and learning how to be still before our Maker.
*****this is an interesting note. I have noticed this guy before and always have wondered why he does it. I don't have a picture as there is no way to stop and take a picture because of the constant flow of traffic. However, he is always there. I always thought that he came long distances, yet although I do not have an answer for that, I can almost be certain he parks his car/truck not too far off. it takes true courage to do something that to others would look silly and embarrasing. I am not even sure I could do it....it looks a bit intimidating, but God knows this man is courageous. He might have his reasons behind this, but the most obvious point, he is reminding us of our cross and the True Cross that our father carried to forgive our own sins....it is a reminder that we need to trust on the Lord and let him pull the burdens off our shoulders and give us rest...it is a matter of learning to ask for that Help. It is very humbling seeing this act of pure unselfishness. That he takes his time to carry that huge cross and stand there amongst those many passer bys and their eyes heavily fixed on him and that object of his. IT is indeed a very humbling act.
There, he has made his point with me. I have noticed him and the cross and I have reached out everytime to my own. The man knows what he is doing, although it looks insanely ridiculous. I know where my cross is and I know WHO is in charge.
It's Friday, 4pm somewhere in the middle of a hot-humid summer day. Kids are not in school, rather enjoying themselves at the local beach, rivers, or lakes. Everyone is unaware of the details that sorround our community.
Today, it is one of those Fridays, all entreprenurs, business folks, the typical or average worker is calling it the day. The typical paycheck to paycheck survivors are anxiously driving to their bank to cash in their weekly efforts to better their life. And yet, hidden behind this fast paced scenario is one man. A man, like a shadow perfectly standing there on top of the Montague overpass over the I-26 interstate. Quietly, so concentrated in just glancing through the windshields and into the minds of the unaware souls of his existence. Who is this man? And what is he doing there?
I am one of those passer bys, I capture his image out of the corner of my eye and he stands there, firmly. Lost in a world of his own, deep thought, slightly rubbing his well kept beard. Although it is a hot day, he is standing there with the Sun hitting behind him, making him the perfect invisible being to the eyes of the drivers passing underneath him. But faithfully, religously, he stands there every Friday staring into the distance of the long-rush hour traffic, hoping, and never loosing faith that someone out there will notice IT.
As he stands there so patienly, you can see he has labored so hard to be where he is. Although the Montegue passer bys get distracted, most have become acustomed to seeing him there. His attention however, is on those below him. As the sun blazes behind him, there IT stands, the CROSS. A wooden CROSS that he has so genuinly attached a wheel on the very bottom so that when he is carrying it, it becomes easier on his back and does not drag all the way up the ramp.
YES. He is carrying that cross with a purpose. Perhaps some may consider him a crazy old man. Someone who has nothing better to do, however, it is a simple reminder that regardless of where you are, what you are doing, even if stuck in a mad traffic such as I-26, that you should sit still for a moment and praise God for the wonders He is actively doing in everyone's life. He stands there, not asking for you to throw him money, nor for you to feel pitty or to show off his faith. He is there to give that symbol of peace and sanity.
As anyone who has ever driven on I-26 anytime and any day between the hours of 3pm and 6pm, you can expect to have some angry, frustrated drivers, yet they pause at the sight of such eloquent symbol.
"and so the figure who once had been invisible, the light finally shone upon the meaning of his presence...the light Reflected the one symbol the man was carrying...the CROSS"
Everyone has a cross of their own. We all have our daily struggles and we have to choose how we want to handle the daily tests of faith. Those sudden "burdens" often blind us from the real thing - the CROSS....and learning how to be still before our Maker.
*****this is an interesting note. I have noticed this guy before and always have wondered why he does it. I don't have a picture as there is no way to stop and take a picture because of the constant flow of traffic. However, he is always there. I always thought that he came long distances, yet although I do not have an answer for that, I can almost be certain he parks his car/truck not too far off. it takes true courage to do something that to others would look silly and embarrasing. I am not even sure I could do it....it looks a bit intimidating, but God knows this man is courageous. He might have his reasons behind this, but the most obvious point, he is reminding us of our cross and the True Cross that our father carried to forgive our own sins....it is a reminder that we need to trust on the Lord and let him pull the burdens off our shoulders and give us rest...it is a matter of learning to ask for that Help. It is very humbling seeing this act of pure unselfishness. That he takes his time to carry that huge cross and stand there amongst those many passer bys and their eyes heavily fixed on him and that object of his. IT is indeed a very humbling act.
There, he has made his point with me. I have noticed him and the cross and I have reached out everytime to my own. The man knows what he is doing, although it looks insanely ridiculous. I know where my cross is and I know WHO is in charge.
Monday, August 8, 2011
There is a Way
"When all else fails, lean on Jesus, know that He is constantly listening regardless..."
It is indeed a test of faith having to constantly put up with the negativity behind you. Sometimes I feel as though I am drowning, the mountains become higher and fierceful with so many obstacles. The currents become so strong I can hardly manage to move or attempt to swim across. Sometimes, giving up sounds bitter sweet than to have to carry a load that does not belong to me. Or does it? Is this my greatest test?
So, then how to I manage all of this? Above all things, above all this, there is someone out there in the heavens above patiently thinking of me and prepairing the most beautiful gifts any woman could ask for.....
Oh, I must be patient and wait for all you have for me. I am running out of energy, I feel ready to surrender, I want to escape so badly the trecherous ways of this life. Lord will you hear the cry of my heart? Will you bring me the understanding and wisdom to become that woman of excellence, to be a sister to those in need, to be a mother to the motherless who so passionately sit and wait to feel that love?
Just as the songs says, "who am I?" what purpose do I serve here and how do I continue with such low doze of energy? I need a fresh renewal, a new me, a new person that can step forward and walk through the fierces of storms...to be that person to stand proud and strong...
this is the song of my heart. The cries as I continue to press on forward getting stabbed left and right. Get attacked by the most ferocious of beasts, the meaningless words, and the desperate cries of the sharpest tongues at their best...spilling their every bit of energy and "luscious" words of wisdom.
And thus, I sit up, lift my head up high and continue to walk through the thorny fields of excellence...passing through the vineyards of torment, yet I know that they are mere statues, pillars standing firm as a remnant of those tests of faith, they sit still watching me go and I continue on forward and not looking back.
***
Another note I had accidentally saved on the drafts a long while ago. So here it is...sometimes it does some good to the heart to release the inner bitterness....we are all human beings and for as much as anyone seeks to be a perfect person, we have this part of our heart that needs to be unleashed....set it free...and don't allow for build up.....
peace everyone.
It is indeed a test of faith having to constantly put up with the negativity behind you. Sometimes I feel as though I am drowning, the mountains become higher and fierceful with so many obstacles. The currents become so strong I can hardly manage to move or attempt to swim across. Sometimes, giving up sounds bitter sweet than to have to carry a load that does not belong to me. Or does it? Is this my greatest test?
So, then how to I manage all of this? Above all things, above all this, there is someone out there in the heavens above patiently thinking of me and prepairing the most beautiful gifts any woman could ask for.....
Oh, I must be patient and wait for all you have for me. I am running out of energy, I feel ready to surrender, I want to escape so badly the trecherous ways of this life. Lord will you hear the cry of my heart? Will you bring me the understanding and wisdom to become that woman of excellence, to be a sister to those in need, to be a mother to the motherless who so passionately sit and wait to feel that love?
Just as the songs says, "who am I?" what purpose do I serve here and how do I continue with such low doze of energy? I need a fresh renewal, a new me, a new person that can step forward and walk through the fierces of storms...to be that person to stand proud and strong...
this is the song of my heart. The cries as I continue to press on forward getting stabbed left and right. Get attacked by the most ferocious of beasts, the meaningless words, and the desperate cries of the sharpest tongues at their best...spilling their every bit of energy and "luscious" words of wisdom.
And thus, I sit up, lift my head up high and continue to walk through the thorny fields of excellence...passing through the vineyards of torment, yet I know that they are mere statues, pillars standing firm as a remnant of those tests of faith, they sit still watching me go and I continue on forward and not looking back.
***
Another note I had accidentally saved on the drafts a long while ago. So here it is...sometimes it does some good to the heart to release the inner bitterness....we are all human beings and for as much as anyone seeks to be a perfect person, we have this part of our heart that needs to be unleashed....set it free...and don't allow for build up.....
peace everyone.
Foreigner wearing the Wrong Shoes
"We are all foreigners of this world, our life is a temporary life here on earth...we strive to survive, we acquire our worldly acomplishments, yet it will all come to past...."
I am now 27 years old, soon to be 28. For the last 14years or so, I have been a stranger, a foreigner of this land, I am stranger of culture, language, and beliefs. I am that individual like most foreigners of this Great Country - USA, I am just as much of a foreigner as anyone. However, I have spent most of my life adjusting and although I will never complete the cycle of conformity and be 100% accepted by those "judgementally" folks out there; I continue to strive forward.
Lately there have been series of events taking place of acts of discrimination, haunting looks, vicious words of anger and poisenous stabs towards those of us that regardless of inmigration status, will forever carry that label in our foreheads. The "Promised Land" to those who cross the border has turned the honey into a bitter tar of death, judment, and a hunt for survival all over again. The Land founded by inmigrants even those who traveled by the Mayflower and landed in this Northern territory were as we are today, inmigrants. They came and took the land of the true American Natives...all those wars, the deaths, the tears shed....yet it is beginning to repeat itself.
I know most will not jump into agreement, neither am I looking to have anyone agree in any way shape or form. We are the land of Christianity, we are those who call ourselves true followers, yet when one sheep falls short, I see no one running out to try and help this sheep out. We are always trying to be so politically correct that we forget the true meaning of Following our Father.
It is very ironic how a native of an inmigrant signs into Law a law that is designed to potentially corral all undocumented workers out of the fields, out of the construction sites, out of the dirty labors that no one else wants to do. There is a HIKE of unemployemnt, however, no one is running out to get the jobs that those foreigners are willing to do...Sure, agriculture giants are at fault for hiring low wage workers.
Let's just say, I am highly disappointed that because I am different in every way than a tradicional "North American" I am now facing racial profiling. Regardless of my education, my "status," my apparance will be sufficient in order for an officer of the law to question me.
I am disappointed that no matter what we do, how much contribution we give our goverment, we are still at the lowest of the pit. Mind you, I know nothing about politics, but enough to have a common sense that we are driving our economy down, we are not getting our money back because of all the drug lords in Mexico, central, and South America are pulling the money down....
This life is a temporary life, our life is barrowed for us to show our hearts for others, to reach out and help the helpless...to provide comfort, shelter, feed those less fortunate than us. We condem those who "reproduce" regardless if they have the means to provide for their families or not, we condem those and take the frustration as an obligation to do something about it...we also condem those who actually work hard in order to sustain those in their family. We sit back and talk about ways that "those" people should follow, that they should have more education, we sit back and talk....yet we don't take initiative to take a step forward and say, I will be that difference, I will help this community out and give them a piece of my knowledge....we simply sit back, relax, and let other's put their grain of sand and hope that it counts for all.
********
I apologize if anyone disagrees, feels offended, or simply thinks I have no idea of what I am talking about. Take the time to ask me and I will share. I have lived through it all. And yet, I sit here and continue to experience every bit of that in a different time, culture, and from those whom I would've never thought I would receive such treatment.
I mean no harm, and I am simply speaking out my disapointed heart. I had been meaning to finish this draft, however, I know I will not get any further. SO here is what I have so far....I might return and talk abit more, however, I have no energy nor time to complete this.
God bless everyone, God Bless this Country for we need it....we are the GIANTS of this world, yet we are falling...
I am now 27 years old, soon to be 28. For the last 14years or so, I have been a stranger, a foreigner of this land, I am stranger of culture, language, and beliefs. I am that individual like most foreigners of this Great Country - USA, I am just as much of a foreigner as anyone. However, I have spent most of my life adjusting and although I will never complete the cycle of conformity and be 100% accepted by those "judgementally" folks out there; I continue to strive forward.
Lately there have been series of events taking place of acts of discrimination, haunting looks, vicious words of anger and poisenous stabs towards those of us that regardless of inmigration status, will forever carry that label in our foreheads. The "Promised Land" to those who cross the border has turned the honey into a bitter tar of death, judment, and a hunt for survival all over again. The Land founded by inmigrants even those who traveled by the Mayflower and landed in this Northern territory were as we are today, inmigrants. They came and took the land of the true American Natives...all those wars, the deaths, the tears shed....yet it is beginning to repeat itself.
I know most will not jump into agreement, neither am I looking to have anyone agree in any way shape or form. We are the land of Christianity, we are those who call ourselves true followers, yet when one sheep falls short, I see no one running out to try and help this sheep out. We are always trying to be so politically correct that we forget the true meaning of Following our Father.
It is very ironic how a native of an inmigrant signs into Law a law that is designed to potentially corral all undocumented workers out of the fields, out of the construction sites, out of the dirty labors that no one else wants to do. There is a HIKE of unemployemnt, however, no one is running out to get the jobs that those foreigners are willing to do...Sure, agriculture giants are at fault for hiring low wage workers.
Let's just say, I am highly disappointed that because I am different in every way than a tradicional "North American" I am now facing racial profiling. Regardless of my education, my "status," my apparance will be sufficient in order for an officer of the law to question me.
I am disappointed that no matter what we do, how much contribution we give our goverment, we are still at the lowest of the pit. Mind you, I know nothing about politics, but enough to have a common sense that we are driving our economy down, we are not getting our money back because of all the drug lords in Mexico, central, and South America are pulling the money down....
This life is a temporary life, our life is barrowed for us to show our hearts for others, to reach out and help the helpless...to provide comfort, shelter, feed those less fortunate than us. We condem those who "reproduce" regardless if they have the means to provide for their families or not, we condem those and take the frustration as an obligation to do something about it...we also condem those who actually work hard in order to sustain those in their family. We sit back and talk about ways that "those" people should follow, that they should have more education, we sit back and talk....yet we don't take initiative to take a step forward and say, I will be that difference, I will help this community out and give them a piece of my knowledge....we simply sit back, relax, and let other's put their grain of sand and hope that it counts for all.
********
I apologize if anyone disagrees, feels offended, or simply thinks I have no idea of what I am talking about. Take the time to ask me and I will share. I have lived through it all. And yet, I sit here and continue to experience every bit of that in a different time, culture, and from those whom I would've never thought I would receive such treatment.
I mean no harm, and I am simply speaking out my disapointed heart. I had been meaning to finish this draft, however, I know I will not get any further. SO here is what I have so far....I might return and talk abit more, however, I have no energy nor time to complete this.
God bless everyone, God Bless this Country for we need it....we are the GIANTS of this world, yet we are falling...
Wednesday, May 25, 2011
Countless Blessings
I have not written in a while, I have put this blog off for a few months now. So here I am, once again, attempting to recap what has been going on in this crazy world of mine.
I have long put this off, but here is what I have been meaning to write:
LUCAS - el muñeco mas amado (the most lovable baby)
Lucas was born October 12th, 2010. I have been too busy to mark this very important date! Our first nephew in the family, the cutest, most amazing baby ever! (I mean all babies are cute, but my Lucas is precious).
Day by day, I am reminded of his most amazing feautures: the radiant Fuentes smiles, the handsomeness of a little man (both from his dad and mom), the little-big head (GENEOUS), and that little spot right on top of his head: its a little white speck of hair that stands out more as he spends time in the sun fishing with his mom and dad. Yes, Lucas is the light of our eyes! The reason to come together and celebrate the joy of life, family, and purity!
I love him as if he were my own (then again, I love all babies as if they were mine). God has blessed us tremendously with him in our lives. More so, I think God has united our family and we have become closer to each other because of the love and affection we give to our Lucas.
I could not be happier! Well, we do have another nephew/niece on the way! Then again, we will wait upon God's blessing for that little life to become the center of attention as well.
There are actually no words to describe how much I love Lucas. I am the proudest Tia! ( I am sure I can claim that without my sisters or Allison's sister getting competitive on that :) Lucas is now 7months old, has two lower teeth, two upper teeth coming out (huge), and a molar...what?? seriously? Then in May 16th, he decides to say "dada!" He pulls his own weight to stand, he wakes up standing on his crib (so I am told)! Is it me or is this baby growing way too fast? He is using 9month old gear! What's wrong! hahaha.
The point, I am so proud of him for being such a smart baby, more so proud of my sister-in-law Allison who spends countless hours nurturing this baby to be and have this smart personality! He is so active, loves to smile and hardly ever "pouts"! My brother and Allison have him in swimming lessons - oh dear, what a cute little fish he makes! And when he splashes, let's out the cutest of screams, as if he were advancing victoriously in the swimming Olympics!
Lucas loves STRAWBERRIES!!! We spent mother's day at Boone Hall Plantation and he just enjoyed himself, and of course we all enjoyed him! See pics below.
I am soo thankful to God, my brother and his wife for giving us this piece of joy in our hearts, the love, the kindred spirited Lucas who illuminates our faces with gigles and smiles of all sorts. Thank you Lord. I love my nephew and will love on him for years and years to come.
And this is where the SHOCK comes in, it is may 25th, and this baby went from "DADA" to "ALL DONE!" yes, you did read correctly! Lucas, what's wrong with you? LOL! he is growing way too fast and I am not getting all that loving...jajajaa... I am soo proud of him for being so smart! And of course proud of my borther and his wife for the passion, dedication, and love they give him! That is why he is so smart! Not to mention he is the most spoiled baby ever! Has his grandpapi wraped around him, his Grandmami melts with love for him, and his Tios - just play with him like crazy! And then he has his Tias...boy, oh, boy, he has several Tias to run to for SUGAR, veggies (?), and hyperness!!! (that would be me ;-)
All in all, this baby is one of my countless blessings.
MOTHERS - And here I present you with several mom's: birth, love, nurishment, compassion, and accountability.....
God has blessed me with the gift of a mother naturally within me - I have those emotions, the love, the kindness within to give unconditional love to any kid...one day I will be that guiding light to a child who needs healing through love....
Where did I learn all that? God provided me with several mother's throughout my life. Yes, I am sure some of you believe in just 1 mother, I have had several. Where are they now? They have become me...
My mother of birth - she was one tough nut to crack. Yes, God gave mea mother who despite the hardships of life, did all she could to provide for her kids, to give her everything, to put aside her life and let her blood flow for ours...although she made the ultimate sacrifice to come to the USA and left us motherless, we never ever were alone...first off God was there watching over us, then HE placed our Angel Papa Chico. Later on, my second mother showed up in my life...Mama Cata...My birth mother made the ultimate sacrife that no mother should ever have to do....doing what she did, going through what she did...could not mention it would be too surreal for anyone to understand...including me....she did all that and more....what bravery, what a mother....I admire that strength...that power, that determination and strength to set aside her personal life, her personal emotions to seek out what was best for us.....
Mother of Love - for every stage of life, we loose something, we gain something greater. We simply have to be willing to accept that change and grow with the seasons of life and flow with that current. Mama Cati (mama Catocha), she became my second mother to me and my siblings. God placed her there to be that fortress, that angel to keep us warm on cold nights...she was there to restore that love and care for us in part of the absense of our mother. Slowly you will learn more and more about these seasons of our lives. More so I write this because Lucas one day he will want to know...and if one day I am blessed with a baby, he/she will want to know the roots of his/her mom and family. I could go on and on..but slowly you will learn this from me..
Mother of Nurishment - This is our mother once we arrived in the USA. our Puerto Rican mother, the woman who despite our hard heads put up with us and gave us her love...treated us as her kids and nourished our minds with discipline, education, kept us in line all through school - college...and the now... she became that mother at that/this stage of life. Although sometimes it is hard to keep up with so many mothers, I am still blessed to have all of them as part of my life....
Mother of Compassion/Accountability - this one is hard...hard to wrap up how from nothingness, became everything. She was my mother role, a friend, and a sister all in one. A friend whom I came to and shared my "guy interests to," the one who spent countless hours awake waiting for me to be home from a night of movies and friends...the mom who woke up at 2am and drove across all of Charleston to pick my friends and me after being left stranded by "SCORCHY" (my car) in the middle of Hwy 17 in Mount Pleasant. Yes, she is my mother of compassion and accountability...although no longer in my life, God knows she is still as much part of my life as ever will be...I will respect her, love her, and will continue to pray for her and her stages of life.....a love that regarless of what happened in between....will remain alive in my heart...yes Elizabeth, I do love you like the mother, sister, and friend you were then...thank you for that!
So see here, I'm awarded mother's for every stage of my life...right now, I am an orphan...or perhaps I am becoming that mother figure to someone and am no longer needing a mother to look after me....God has blessed me countlessly with such love, such faithfullness from those around me....and thus I am the person I am today....(although at times I don't feel like myself)....but here I am, slowly becoming that someone...that mother figure to someone out there....maybe that someone is searching for me? Then again, I feel as though I already have been that mother....when our mom left, my youngest siblings needed me,when we lived with Mama Cati I was like her in every way, when we got to the USA, my step-sisters needed me, when I moved in with Elizabeth, her girls needed me....so do we call it even? Not quite yet.....I know God has more in store....
There, God's countless blessings just seem to put off all that negativity that has been around me lately. Yes, I am not perfect, my world is not perfect. I don't have all of the goodies (materialistic items), don't have the luxuries of this vain world, but I have the greatest gifts...a peace within of abundant love, compassion given and inherited through the different stages of my life. The love of my husband who continually reminds me that it is ok to be human and to make mistakes, to be tough and get up...it is a tough road we are traveling, but together and with God's help, we will overcome these trials and tribulations. And so, I rest my case....the abundance of my blessings satisfy and overpower the negativity within those around me.
Thanks to you my Lord for giving me such a patient heart! I will press on and continued pushing forward to become that woman of excellence...earning my rewards...and accomplishing the requirements needed to survive daily on this harsh world of mine.....
I have long put this off, but here is what I have been meaning to write:
LUCAS - el muñeco mas amado (the most lovable baby)
Lucas was born October 12th, 2010. I have been too busy to mark this very important date! Our first nephew in the family, the cutest, most amazing baby ever! (I mean all babies are cute, but my Lucas is precious).
Day by day, I am reminded of his most amazing feautures: the radiant Fuentes smiles, the handsomeness of a little man (both from his dad and mom), the little-big head (GENEOUS), and that little spot right on top of his head: its a little white speck of hair that stands out more as he spends time in the sun fishing with his mom and dad. Yes, Lucas is the light of our eyes! The reason to come together and celebrate the joy of life, family, and purity!
I love him as if he were my own (then again, I love all babies as if they were mine). God has blessed us tremendously with him in our lives. More so, I think God has united our family and we have become closer to each other because of the love and affection we give to our Lucas.
I could not be happier! Well, we do have another nephew/niece on the way! Then again, we will wait upon God's blessing for that little life to become the center of attention as well.
There are actually no words to describe how much I love Lucas. I am the proudest Tia! ( I am sure I can claim that without my sisters or Allison's sister getting competitive on that :) Lucas is now 7months old, has two lower teeth, two upper teeth coming out (huge), and a molar...what?? seriously? Then in May 16th, he decides to say "dada!" He pulls his own weight to stand, he wakes up standing on his crib (so I am told)! Is it me or is this baby growing way too fast? He is using 9month old gear! What's wrong! hahaha.
The point, I am so proud of him for being such a smart baby, more so proud of my sister-in-law Allison who spends countless hours nurturing this baby to be and have this smart personality! He is so active, loves to smile and hardly ever "pouts"! My brother and Allison have him in swimming lessons - oh dear, what a cute little fish he makes! And when he splashes, let's out the cutest of screams, as if he were advancing victoriously in the swimming Olympics!
Lucas loves STRAWBERRIES!!! We spent mother's day at Boone Hall Plantation and he just enjoyed himself, and of course we all enjoyed him! See pics below.
I am soo thankful to God, my brother and his wife for giving us this piece of joy in our hearts, the love, the kindred spirited Lucas who illuminates our faces with gigles and smiles of all sorts. Thank you Lord. I love my nephew and will love on him for years and years to come.
And this is where the SHOCK comes in, it is may 25th, and this baby went from "DADA" to "ALL DONE!" yes, you did read correctly! Lucas, what's wrong with you? LOL! he is growing way too fast and I am not getting all that loving...jajajaa... I am soo proud of him for being so smart! And of course proud of my borther and his wife for the passion, dedication, and love they give him! That is why he is so smart! Not to mention he is the most spoiled baby ever! Has his grandpapi wraped around him, his Grandmami melts with love for him, and his Tios - just play with him like crazy! And then he has his Tias...boy, oh, boy, he has several Tias to run to for SUGAR, veggies (?), and hyperness!!! (that would be me ;-)
All in all, this baby is one of my countless blessings.
MOTHERS - And here I present you with several mom's: birth, love, nurishment, compassion, and accountability.....
God has blessed me with the gift of a mother naturally within me - I have those emotions, the love, the kindness within to give unconditional love to any kid...one day I will be that guiding light to a child who needs healing through love....
Where did I learn all that? God provided me with several mother's throughout my life. Yes, I am sure some of you believe in just 1 mother, I have had several. Where are they now? They have become me...
My mother of birth - she was one tough nut to crack. Yes, God gave mea mother who despite the hardships of life, did all she could to provide for her kids, to give her everything, to put aside her life and let her blood flow for ours...although she made the ultimate sacrifice to come to the USA and left us motherless, we never ever were alone...first off God was there watching over us, then HE placed our Angel Papa Chico. Later on, my second mother showed up in my life...Mama Cata...My birth mother made the ultimate sacrife that no mother should ever have to do....doing what she did, going through what she did...could not mention it would be too surreal for anyone to understand...including me....she did all that and more....what bravery, what a mother....I admire that strength...that power, that determination and strength to set aside her personal life, her personal emotions to seek out what was best for us.....
Mother of Love - for every stage of life, we loose something, we gain something greater. We simply have to be willing to accept that change and grow with the seasons of life and flow with that current. Mama Cati (mama Catocha), she became my second mother to me and my siblings. God placed her there to be that fortress, that angel to keep us warm on cold nights...she was there to restore that love and care for us in part of the absense of our mother. Slowly you will learn more and more about these seasons of our lives. More so I write this because Lucas one day he will want to know...and if one day I am blessed with a baby, he/she will want to know the roots of his/her mom and family. I could go on and on..but slowly you will learn this from me..
Mother of Nurishment - This is our mother once we arrived in the USA. our Puerto Rican mother, the woman who despite our hard heads put up with us and gave us her love...treated us as her kids and nourished our minds with discipline, education, kept us in line all through school - college...and the now... she became that mother at that/this stage of life. Although sometimes it is hard to keep up with so many mothers, I am still blessed to have all of them as part of my life....
Mother of Compassion/Accountability - this one is hard...hard to wrap up how from nothingness, became everything. She was my mother role, a friend, and a sister all in one. A friend whom I came to and shared my "guy interests to," the one who spent countless hours awake waiting for me to be home from a night of movies and friends...the mom who woke up at 2am and drove across all of Charleston to pick my friends and me after being left stranded by "SCORCHY" (my car) in the middle of Hwy 17 in Mount Pleasant. Yes, she is my mother of compassion and accountability...although no longer in my life, God knows she is still as much part of my life as ever will be...I will respect her, love her, and will continue to pray for her and her stages of life.....a love that regarless of what happened in between....will remain alive in my heart...yes Elizabeth, I do love you like the mother, sister, and friend you were then...thank you for that!
So see here, I'm awarded mother's for every stage of my life...right now, I am an orphan...or perhaps I am becoming that mother figure to someone and am no longer needing a mother to look after me....God has blessed me countlessly with such love, such faithfullness from those around me....and thus I am the person I am today....(although at times I don't feel like myself)....but here I am, slowly becoming that someone...that mother figure to someone out there....maybe that someone is searching for me? Then again, I feel as though I already have been that mother....when our mom left, my youngest siblings needed me,when we lived with Mama Cati I was like her in every way, when we got to the USA, my step-sisters needed me, when I moved in with Elizabeth, her girls needed me....so do we call it even? Not quite yet.....I know God has more in store....
There, God's countless blessings just seem to put off all that negativity that has been around me lately. Yes, I am not perfect, my world is not perfect. I don't have all of the goodies (materialistic items), don't have the luxuries of this vain world, but I have the greatest gifts...a peace within of abundant love, compassion given and inherited through the different stages of my life. The love of my husband who continually reminds me that it is ok to be human and to make mistakes, to be tough and get up...it is a tough road we are traveling, but together and with God's help, we will overcome these trials and tribulations. And so, I rest my case....the abundance of my blessings satisfy and overpower the negativity within those around me.
Thanks to you my Lord for giving me such a patient heart! I will press on and continued pushing forward to become that woman of excellence...earning my rewards...and accomplishing the requirements needed to survive daily on this harsh world of mine.....
 |
| Lucas, ready for strawberries |
 |
| Destroying those strawberries :) |
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| Normal smiles from Lucas!! Mom and Daddy! |
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